Today I recieved the following email from my almamata (sp?), Sarah Lawrence College:

Dear SLC alum,

Career Counseling has received a full-time job opportunity to work with SLC alum and author, Dr. Amanda Foreman. Please see below for a full job listing and directions on how to apply.

best,
Career Counseling

Full-time assistant position with SLC Alum, Dr. Amanda Foreman

International best-selling and prize-winning author with one book a major feature film and several projects in the works is seeking new assistant. Responsibilities include: general accounting, filing taxes, research, liaising with publishers, agents and film producers, managing three residences and a large staff and managing social and work diaries for a large family. Applicant would be asked to travel with employer on research-based trips as well as occasional other excursions. Applicant must be able to drive, willing to travel, comfortable meeting people from all walks of life and be prepared for anything to come out of left field. Previous assistant staying for four years and was much loved by all. This is a full-time position. Benefits include 3 weeks paid vacation and health insurance. Starting salary $40k+. Position based in NYC.

To apply please email a resume and cover letter to ________

So from the beginning of this email I thought, "well, I'd love to work as a published author's assistant! This could be great!" and then I see "accounting, filing taxes," and I think "yeah ok that's not happening!" and how quickly the rest of the email became "not for me". Then I started thinking how often people say "not for me" to things. When they're shopping and they get approached by a sales person thats maybe a little too pushy, or when they're on a date that just goes on and on but really goes nowhere, or when you're too scared to push yourself to really do something you've never done before. I think I've fallen into all of those things, but most recently it's been that last part. I look at jobs and sometimes its good that I can say "not for me". But I really wish I could be this chique published author's assitant.

I'm lost now.

Reversing Years of Women's Rights Work

esterday I played little miss Holly Housewife and did all of Jason's laundry and cleaned the apartment and watched wife swap all day. It felt good to lay down and masturbate on a bed that I just made myself and in a clean apartment that's kinda my home. It's funny because before I didn't know how to describe Buda to people (there *was* a time period of like 2 days before he was my boyfriend) now I don't know how to describe home. Waldi was like "oh are you at ...your real home or...your other home...?" to me on the phone the other day so I'll just call this place my Other Home. My rent and parent free other home...with a giant hole in the wall where a kitchen should be and a boiler two feet from our bedside. Bedside boiler. Sounds like a band you'd see playing at The Bamboozle.

So I think for like two weeks I'm going to try this home maker thing. I'm going to pretend its like Mona Lisa Smile kinda times for women and I'll just wake up every morning, do yoga, take a shower, have some coffee, start cleaning, start cooking (yeah I'll practice at my house so that I don't set his on fire), and just take care of my man when he gets back from work.

To all the feminists screaming at me right now...go fuck yourselves. I have a job. I'm always going to be working and being all independent...at least not until I'm married to a rich, student loan debt free, doctor. Because, that is the dream right?? He takes care of me, I'll take care of him...lmao I sound like a hooker.

Speaking of my doctor, I'd like to give a very big congratulations to my man Jason Buda for getting his Physician's Assistant's certification today! Even though he'll never read this and I have no idea where he is right now.